Rogue Debby
Ivybridge Library is proving to be a vital meeting point for isolated people who are living with chronic illness.
'Rogue' Debby, 57, lives in Ivybridge. She's an editor and artist, who had a career in publishing. She lives with complex post-traumatic stress disorder (cPTSD), fibromyalgia, functional neurological disorder (FND), IBS, carpal tunnel syndrome, neuropathy, diabetes and high blood pressure.
Debby met 'Warrior DJ' Marie in an online chronic-pain support group during lockdown in 2021. Marie, 57, who lives in Torquay, had a career in the care sector until it was discovered she had Charcot-Marie-Tooth Disease (CMT), a rare hereditary condition affecting just 3% of the population. She lives with constant pain and mental health issues such as OCD and cognitive difficulties. Marie is currently undergoing some new medical treatments to alleviate her conditions and hoping multiple surgeries are now off the table.
Debby spent seven years bedridden before going 'rogue' and Marie's anxieties were so overwhelming when she met Debby, that she hadn't left her house for eight years – only venturing out for medical appointments. Her world had become incredibly small and life painfully limited, and Debby's life had been exhausting living in her bedroom with stress related complications.
Marie and Debby validated each other's health concerns, realising that although they had very different conditions, their symptoms were incredibly similar. The support they gave to each other was something they wanted to share with the rest of the chronic illness world and so Rogue Debby CIC was born in July 2021.
Four years later this non-profit organisation provides immediate support - without waiting lists - for people living with the mental and physical aspects of chronic illness. The friends share the positive peer-supported way they had found to transform their own lives, with the buddy system, humour, grace and definitely no judgement. The online zoom sessions include peers from all over the world who help each other but more locally, people wanted Marie and Debby to set up an in-person support group – so they chose Ivybridge Library.
"Living with a collection of chronic health conditions has been a defining aspect of my life," said Debby. "I understand first-hand how ill health can make a person feel less than themselves. However, Marie and I have also learned that with proper understanding and management, we can transform our lives for the better. We are not a lost cause; we all have purpose. This role allows us to channel our own experiences and insights into meaningful action, helping others navigate their own journeys toward better health and well-being. One important aspect of it was bringing mental and physical health together – everywhere separates the two and we need both mental and physical health support in the same place -because this is the reality of living with chronic conditions.
"We chose Ivybridge Library because it's a happy, friendly and brilliant space to host our in-person events. The staff make us both feel safe, included and very welcome and we love the team's positive vibes and happy smiles."
Up to eight people meet at a time, on the second and fourth Friday of each month for the Rogue Debby CIC Chronic Smiles Cafés. Marie and Debby say anyone who wants to feel validated, heard, less judged and be able to get to the end of a sentence without having to defend themselves – would probably feel a lot better after coming along.
"We've seen some genuinely incredible changes in the people who've joined us," added Marie. "One person came to us after developing a life changing illness in their 40's. They hadn't left the house for over a year and a half and said their confidence was shattered. The idea of being around others felt impossible. But after just a few sessions at Chronic Smiles Café, something shifted. They began to smile again, to share, to believe in themself. Inspired by the encouragement and connection they felt in the group, they set themselves a goal: to walk a little every day and raise funds for The Brain Trust. Not only did they complete the challenge, they raised over £1,600.
"Another member hadn't spoken in a group setting for years due to anxiety and trauma, but now they read aloud, share their thoughts, and laugh with us. Someone else, who once relied on a walking stick and barely left the house, arrived one day without it - glowing with confidence. We've had people tell us it's the first time they've felt seen, heard, and accepted without having to explain themselves. One said it's the highlight of their fortnight—the only time they don't feel broken or alone. These transformations feel like a dramatic Hollywood moment for our peers, they're powerful and the sense of relief is palpable. They remind us why we do this."
